Vietnam was experiential while I was shallow to say that it was 'historical and cultural' because that would be the kitsch part of Vietnam, the Vietnam I experienced was a very much a fueled (because of the traffic) and communist one (don't bark at me for saying this).

I'll just write out some excerpts from my handwritten notes chronologically (on which I wrote on some hotel letter papers). And by chronologically I mean by the day and not by the thoughts haha.

DAY 1

Ho Chi Minh City has somewhat fulfilled my presumption of traffic chaos. Appropriately I would have described it as ebb and flow and terrific jams, the constant movement of motorbikes and scooters and all directions give the vibe of a rapidly developing and very vibrant city. (But my experience over 5 days tell me otherwise, I mostly think of it as massive unproductivity).

Maybe thailand has bad traffic but HCMC's is the epitome of ebb and flow, I simply can't find another phrase to describe it. During peak hours (or in fact all hours) we mostly marvel and frighten ourselves being in the middle of the anarchic traffic. The sheer volume, energy and disarray is pretty much the reason to visit the city. It also formed the basis of what we mostly discussed in the car whilst being snared in bottlenecks.

The city definitely jumps at you in it being such a deep-seated experience, being the polar opposite of the going on tour to a nice tourist enhanced country. Vietnam is still very much authentic and genuine but not quite that fuzzy and comfortable holiday.

Ben Tanh Market was a-maze-ing in its disorder, I enjoyed the way it seemed kitsch and tourist oriented yet very much local. My mom found its narrow pushiness stifling and felt faint but I relished the buzz of its entirety (erm also because it was a rare shopping opportunity, but drab shopping I assure you. Lacquerware anyone?).

On a side note, I wanted to be a good tourist so I tried to be less critical and to adopt a backpacker's sort of warm embrace towards the traffic (still infuriating!), dust and all.

DAY 2

Today was harrowing, we toured the city, visited the War Remnants Museum and almost died in the Vietnam's football frenzy.

The War Remnants was just like reviews said, propaganda fueled but still very much compelling and horrifying. I mean, the pictures and displays were undeniably facts but I guess it was propaganda in the way the captions and explanations convinced you of the war crimes. I was never a fan of wars and history and museums but this was one museum that made you affected, recoil and tear a little. The deformed fetuses, guillotine, tiger cages, torture tactics were harsh and crippling even for cold-hearted me. It was slightly education even, since I didn't know much about the reality of the war and about Agent Orange (chemical defoliant sprayed over the land to destroy the land and ecology, resulting in generations of genetic deformities). To make it worse, we saw several heavy deformed vietnamese during the trip, I couldn't help but wonder if they were such due to the war.

The football frenzy: it was Vietnam vs. Singapore in the SEA games semi-finals, Vietnam won, and took to the streets in celebration. In the meantime, we were stuck in the gridlock for 3 hours striaght, most of the time 100m away from our hotel. It would be an understatement to say they painted the town red (with their red communist flag).

Pictures may suffice to describe the trauma of being in the car with thousands milling around us. It was like being in a riot or rampage and is definitely that once in 50 lifetimes experience. During that time, we were all sort of shivering with pure fear and tearing in horror. What could I say? Vietnam's communist and nationalist spirit was up on display. Swarming the highway to the city centre, they set up roadblocks with their motorbikes, stood on their bikes and waved the now very ominous red flag madly. Such a consolidated experience of communism >.<

Here's a video of what happened that night:

I wouldn't ever want to be caught in such a frenzy again but I was thankful it came as part of my Vietnam experience. It left us flummoxed with our un-nationalism, grateful for partial safety and somewhat hopeless going in circles, coming out of one roadblock to get entrenched in another block party near Independence Park. We now call it the Vietnamese cult movement hahaha.

DAY 3

Yesterday's ordeal made the usual ebb and flow seem rather tranquil (but it isn't really). The swarming bothered us less and being in a car just gives you the feeling of being a carcass surrounded by flies (being the motorbikes). We kind of just gave up commenting on the traffic.

Today we went on tour to the Cu Chi Tunnels , another war related attraction. This one helped to enforce the resilience of the vietnamese and the horror of war crimes and all that they want us to believe.

The tunnels were dug over 30 years by the guerillas during the war to escape from the Americans. We went into a one-storey tunnel, mom felt claustrophobic and so we did not proceed to go to the second or third storeys (underground!). The tunnels were enlarged for tourists but the thought of the vietnamese worming through them, giving birth in them, cooking in them and eventually defeating the Americans was a bleak one but definitely admirable.

DAY 4

We went on a day tour to the Mekong delta but I was pretty disappointed with how I didn't get to see the river in the way I studied it. We stuck to going upstream, so I didn't see the delta and the view of the river was mainly the wide lower course from a boat's perspective. It was mostly visits to riverside farms (ack- touristy) and a sampan ride down a tributary rowed by old ladies. The sampan ride was nice and surreal because of the swish and glide of the sampan through the narrow and quiet river path.

Quite a nice change from the war crap that sort of messes with your mind.

DAY 5

We went home today.

All I feel is this deep love and admiration for my dad surviving in such a strangling city and I am just really glad to go home with my experience.

I am having such trouble uploading the pictures, I'll do them another day.

I've been reading too many random books except those I need to.

Its really odd how you never want to read your lit texts and you want to read everything else that isn't. I've read about half of both WSS and IC but stuffed them in a corner in my study and forgotten about them for half a month.

In the meantime, I have with much critical analysis discovered that Anne Tyler is not too bad (based on having read half of Digging to America and none of The Amateur Marriage both of which I just borrowed). Digging to America deals somewhat with the postcolonial syndrome I am rather aquatinted with now (hahaha): immigrants - culture clashes - rejection - rebellion - the idea of homogeneity - traditions-values (both being challenged) - esteem issues - inferiority/superiority - fitting in - erm Iranians in America - Americans in America with Iranian friends - Iranians and Americans adopting Korean kids - triple colonisation of identity (haha example being the adopted Korean girl with Iranian American parents) etc. I like the idea that I am thinking about the subtle (I hope) theme so much so I am not exactly forgetting all about lit. Actually I am pretty sure I am deluding myself about the understated nuances I like myself to think that I notice because they're very much in your face.

But Anne Tyler writes in a very nondescript family fiction way that could get a little dull but doesn't because I am pinching myself with admiration of how I can spot the post-co theme. I could very possibly be bored by her but the book's strangely magical and captivating in a homely-very shy read- but still quite intriguing way.

Quite a change from some book I've been reading about 3 pregnant women, a traumatising example of chicklit gone a little awry (for me), The Yorkshire Pudding Club. I guess I am not mother material yet hahaha.

I am going to Ho Chi Minh in 4 days and I am feeling really dreary and woozy because I've waited for a pretty long time to go on holiday.

After about 4 barely rustled guidebooks and quite a lot of tripadvisor.com, I think I've come to know Vietnam a peek better than it being just another Southeast Asian LDC. Actually I think Vietnam (or rather Ho Chi Minh) is the epitome of the SEAsian LDC because it is so much like a less cosmopolitan Thailand (shopping not as exciting, I gather) with how its urbanizing so quickly yet having a somewhat non-parallel way of development (or so my feeble mind figured out with what little I know of urbanization and LDCs and vietnam).

I've been pretty fascinated with Vietnamese postcolonial culture (not purely to do with studying post colonial lit!) because of its French influences (at least what I read of in the guidebooks about the Old Quarter in Hanoi, architecture, old people who can speak French and pâté baguettes). But I recently realized too that all the amalgamation, hyphenation and blending of cultures seems so 'cultural and historical' (and touristy) because I am just pretty much immune to my own little singaporean post colonial orb (but lets just not go down our merlions and fishing villages rant today). It always seems like a foreign country's culture is way more visceral than our own (and no I am not unpatriotic) however foreign. It'll be a slightly different holiday without the tour group slumming and rose-tinted glories in a chartered bus since we'll be around on our own (to all the usual tourist destinations hahaha). I am just happy to go on holiday, it doesn't matter if I've to wear sandals all the time to ventilate my sweaty feet in humid Ho Chi Minh.

Springrolls, Pho (pronounced fur) and baguettes here we come! (haha I think Frommers and Lonely Planet got to me).